A word about discrimination

dis-crim-i-na-tion: treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit: racial and religious intolerance and discrimination.

I have a somber message regarding a topic that has been troubling me for nigh on these some 33 years of my existence.

I have felt bullied, pressured, harassed, diminished and belittled by a ruthless dictatorship of individuals that control my life in the harshest of ways. You know who you are people! I am making a stand and calling like-minded people to join me in my cause for awareness! For a new day! A better tomorrow! Just not too early tomorrow...

I am referring to a group I Will call "MP" or Morning People. MP established such heinous, controlling mechanisms such as Morning news, 7:00 A.M. traffic jams, 8:00 A.M. store opening, 5:00 store closing, curfew, early morning exercises, Morning calls, sayings like "The early bird gets the worm!" "Early to bed, Early to rise, makes a man healthy, Wealth and Wise!" and the most hideous of all--DAYLIGHT SAVINGS!!!!

If we exam each one of these devices we can see that they are injected with privileged dominance and masked by a contorted tone of chipperness. Sort of like your German teacher Mrs. Falke. The one who greeted you with a fake smile that you thought for sure was going to crack her narrow, gaunt and otherwise stern face. The one who stared down at you through silver rimmed glasses with squinting eyes and pursed lips that were surrounded by a ring of cracked lines, making it look like a volcano threatening to spew out harsh criticisms at any moment. And she would roll her head around almost like she was continually cracking her neck or letting her brain swirl and marinate in the hate filled juices that surely sloshed around under her skull. Let us not forget how she continually paced in front of the classroom with a ruler in one hand that she wielded like a sword. Slapping her desk with when she was angry. Pointing and smacking the chalkboard when she wanted to emphasize a word. Words that when she repeated, sounded like a scream a black belt might emit as he inflicted a neck breaking kick to his victim's throat. You know, that kind of wry smile she would give as you walked in the class as she would say "Gud morning class! Velkom to my class! Very vell, ve shall begin!" with a smile that said "I have planned a very exciting set of tortures to inflict your minds with, I can hardly contain my excitement!"

By the way, Mrs. Falke, big time MP! Like upper eschelon MP!

I am not a coffee drinker, so I am forced to conform to MP standards unaided by any external stimulants. Coffee is no doubt a method derived of necessity for the general masses to conform to MP regulations. MP says I should be at work by 8:00, at my desk, well rested, perfectly groomed and chomping at the bit to begin my day. MP is. MP has already been awake for 3 or 4 hours. MP has already exercised, showered, eaten breakfast, read the paper, let the the dog out, done the crossword, vacuumed the house, mowed the lawn, washed the car, washed the dog, washed the house, watched the traffic report, drove to work, checked the email, and ran updates on their computer.

I however, have fallen out of bed, put something on in the dark. I hope I at least picked something out my closet this time and not Mandy's. Brushed my teeth because it tastes like I might have been sucking on a poopsicle all night. Get in my car, somehow get to work, even though I don't recall any details, like if I stopped for any stop signs that I know are on the way. I fall into my seat, hair disheveled, bloodshot eyes, vaguely aware of my surroundings. MP says to me "Gud morning! Velkom to vork! Very vell, ve shall begin!" through pursed lips and a wry smile.

MP has gone to great lengths to ensure the world conforms to its standards including changing the time twice a year so that MP has more daylight in the morning. This sadistic illustration demonstrates how far MP will go to control its environment while the rest of us are literally still asleep.

I have always felt this to be an unfortunate circumstance because it forces me to give my best efforts to my employer when I am at my worst.

Is there something that can be done? I believe so. As the day progresses I notice the MP begins to wither. MP's hair begins to unravel. MP's energy level declines. by about 1 o'clock in the afternoon MP and I are on equal grounds, I on my way up, MP making their way down. By about 7 or 8 o'clock there is a complete roll reversal. MP is only vaguely aware of their surrounding. MP is fumbling around for a toothbrush, because it tastes like MP has been sucking on a poopsicle. MP stumbles around in the dark and collapses onto a bed, hopefully their own this time. I am awake now. I have eaten dinner, read the paper, let the the dog out, done the crossword, vacuumed the house, mowed the lawn, washed the car, washed the dog, washed the house, watched the late show, checked the email, and ran updates on my computer. Mentally I am at the top of my game. Solutions to problems come to me, I am alert and aware and I understand most things. I am ready to start projects, do stuff, go places. MP has seen to it stores close, things are turned off and stuff is locked and boarded up for the night... so it can be open bright and early in the morning to accommodate MP.

What about NP? (Night person) NP is forced to try to go to bed at a reasonable bed time so that they can get up when MP says so. NP will most likely lay in bed for several hours thinking about how people ever existed without pillows, how did people cut their hair before scissors? How about before knives? How did people shave before razors? Did they shave before razors? What came first razors or shaving? When did shaving cream come into play? What did they originally use for shaving cream? If people had to cut their hair with sharpened rocks, did it hurt to get your hair cut? Did many people cut their hair back then? What did they do about allergies? Or, whatever my active mind decides to latch on to. I waste my most mentally active moments trying get to sleep. MP has none of these problems.

MP gets the whole world, and door buster sales. NP gets Denny's and Wal-Mart. I personally, am I little frightened by what I see at both locations during regular business hours, at 1 or 2 AM, The patrons of either location look like the wild contrivement of Tim Burton. I guess we have vampires too. I saw one eating a breakfast skillet at Denny's once. I think he was wearing a trench coat... and a Mickey mouse shirt.

NPs unite with me! While MPs are blissfully sleeping in bed we can reverse centuries old traditions! We can establish morning curfews, change business time to 10-6 or maybe even 11-7. convince the lumber stores and auto parts stores to be open until 1 AM... because seriously, there is nothing more annoying than realizing you just need an O-ring or a hinge to complete a project and realizing your store closed 15 minutes ago! And possibly the coup de grace, final elimination of daylight savings time! Join with me as we end the tyrannical death grip MPs hold on civilization! MPs might be the first to strike, but we will be the last ones standing! HUZZAH!!!!