Twins

Recently my wife's twin sister moved in while she gets started in a new school program, finds a new job and gets on her feet a little bit.

After only a short time of this, I only have one observation... or reaffirmation. And that is that twins are crazy. Absolutely, undeniably insane. Individually, perfectly normal. Together, a set of twins will conjoin into a robot with a strobe light head, one chainsaw arm, one puppy dog arm a gumball machine midsection that shoots strawberry flavored moth balls that travels on a monster truck tire instead of legs.

This transformation seems true with any set of twins that I know. I am usually confused, entertained, scared, humored, and alarmed to varying degrees, that if monitored would swing about wildly like a tachometer on a rally car racing on some street course weaving through a sinewy old world township with cobblestone roads and frequent hairpin turns.

Let me illustrate with with a slightly (but not much) exaggerated situation. Our kids are with their grandma and grandpa for a week. Delighted by our recent release in responsibility, Mandy and I went on a date. We sat in the car for a few hours just talking about anything and everything we could think of. We came home and Mindy was just finishing a movie. Mandy started talking to Mindy. I sat on the couch with my brow furrowed. I couldn't figure out what Mandy was talking about. Mindy replied with a comment that seemed absolutely out of context from Mandy's. sort of like this:

Mandy: "One time I asked dad why the sky was blue"

Mindy: "My car has new tires on it"

Mandy: "I decided the sky was blue because blue is pretty"

Mindy: "Sometimes you can get used tires, that are just as good as new, but waaaay cheaper!"

Mandy: "Some lakes are really blue"

Mindy: "The word 'tire' is weird"

The conversation continued on like that and they started interrupting each other and talking louder. Their body language indicated that they were getting angry. I sat there staring, trying to figure out what was happening. Their conversations began to tighten and revolve around a smaller and smaller handful of topics. I tossed in a few thoughts about the dozen or so topics they seemed to be talking about then openly admitted that I had no clue what was happening. They both explained in unison what topic they were discussing and were both in perfect agreeance. It was like watching a Japanese game show... or tennis.

Did I mention Mandy is pregnant with twin girls? Can you imagine how much time I will be spending in the future with a confused scowl on my face watching interactions and wondering what is going on? Considerable amounts of time, my friend, considerable amounts of time.