It's all about me

Have you ever noticed as you read blogs, there are two types of blogs? There are the ones that are done by women and the ones done by men. Women write about other people, what they are doing, events and activities they partook in and how it made them feel. Men write about observations. This is an observation I made. I am a man and I am blogging about it. I was inspired by the female blogs. I thought "I should really write more about other people not just myself. No one but me wants to read about me. Besides writing just about me is selfish!" So, I sat and thought. Came up with a few observations I had made. Thought of a few stories... about me. And then my idea well went dry. Hung my head in shame because everything I thought of eventually came back to ME. ME! ME! ME! I am not sure I know how to tell stories about other people.

I have often seen cows standing in fields looking intently forward chewing their cud.(another observation story) It seemed to me that they MUST be considering some great mystery of life "So in a closed system, the proton exceeds net sub velocity energy transfer through the derivative's initial impact coefficient, inversely!" While in reality they are most likely thinking "Chew... chew... chew... swallow. Burp up more... chew... chew...chew..." So, when Mandy and I were first married (story comes back around to me!) she would often see me staring at the wall blankly. Because as a woman, she would be feeling sad for one of her friends or developing her understanding of why a coworker is sometimes irritable or searching for something to get her mother for her birthday. She assumed (falsely) that because I was on such a deep mental journey that I too was collecting fabulous and profound life lessons. Under this assumption she would beg me to share with her my thoughts so that she too could grow through my understandings. To her inquiries my response was usually "I am not thinking about anything" She would say "OK" but her face would show hurt that I was choosing to harbor away my insights away from her. In reality, I didn't know how to tell her that I was imagining that my car was a rocket powered tank and I was smashing through buildings, which were just shadows cast on the road by trees overhead. Or that I was wondering why bug guts are green and not red. Or if they can breed a horse and a donkey can they breed a grizzly bear and a polar bear? And if they could, what weapon would I use to defend myself if I were attacked by a grizlar bear?
I am sorry, but because Mandy rarely blogs here... you are mainly going to find out that I would defend myself with a rocket powered tank, if I were under attack from a pack of hungry grizlar bears when you read here. It seems I am gender incapable of doing anything likewise.

Well! I don't believe it! I better start working on my rocket tank, cause the grizlar bears are here!