Homework

I was just checking on our poor neglected blog. If our blog were something different, like... a dog (Whatever, it sounds like blog) It would be sitting in the back yard, skin and bones with a nervous, dejected look on it's face. It would be tied to it's house with a short lead of chain. The area covered by the chain would be clearly marked by dead grass, dust and poop. It would spend most of it's time sitting and shifting anxiously on it's front legs. Occasionally it would yelp a small bark of hunger and thirst.
I have the day off to catch up on my homework. If my homework were something different... it would be a parakeet laying lifelessly in the bottom of it's cage. It chirped a few times the first day we had it. I soon realized it would never learn to say anything cool like "Polly want a cracker" or "too legit, too legit to quit". I quickly grew bored of it, never fed it and it died. But today! I have warmed up the defibrillator and am prepared to resurrect the parakeet... I mean my homework. But then I saw the poor dog out in the back yard. He sure looked like he wanted a fresh bowl of water, a heaping scoop of Atta Boy someone to play fetch with and needed a good brushing.
I am sure I will get around to the dead bird sometime today. just as soon as I make sure there is NOTHING else in this entire world that is mildly calling out for my attention. Even if it is going outside, laying down in the grass with a ruler and trying to watch the grass grow.

IT IS HERE

My new website is up and running!!!!!
www.randompen.com
go there now and check it out, and tell all of your friends about it.

Halo

Today for lunch we set up an XBox in the media center today and played Halo on the projector. This was me:
"Hey a gun! How do I pick it up?"
someone appears out of nowhere and drops a sticky grenade to my back and I die.
I re-animate somewhere else.
"Where am I?" I wonder to myself. I feel the controller rumble in my hands and I see bullet flashes around me. Trying to look around I end up looking straight up in the sky and launching several grenades on myself and I die.
I re-animate somewhere else
"Hey a four-wheeler!" I start heading for it. Someone who is invisible and has a sword runs out of nowhere and cleaves me in twain and I die.
I re-animate somewhere else. Not wanting to repeat any of the previous mistakes I stand still for a moment and look at my radar. There is someone behind me! I turn around just in time to see someone charge me and shoot me point blank in the head and I die.
Yeah... I am pretty good! There is a reason I don't own this game and why I am not as good. I had a roommate in college that owned 007. I LOVED this game! It was like crack cocaine! I couldn't put it down. I stopped doing my homework. I stopped eating. I found excuses to miss work and school. I stopped shaving and combing my hair. I wore a bathrobe all day long. If I did venture outside I tried to make it during the night and I scurried everywhere I went. If it was in the day, I would hunch over, squint at the bright light and use my arm to shield my face from it's rays and hiss at the burning UV rays. I realized that if I were to continue living, this game and I had to part directions. I have no doubt Halo and I would have the same relationship if I invited it into my home. I just don't know if I can find an answer to the questions I would get of: "Daddy, Why didn't you sleep last night or the night before" "Daddy, why aren't you going to work today?" "Daddy, why is our house so DARK? I'm scared!" "Daddy, Why is your face SO scratchy?" "Daddy, why did you just shoot that man on the game with a sniper gun and then run up and use all of your bullets in your other gun on his dead body and then laugh like you were a monster?" "Mommy! Daddy said a naughty wor-rrrd!!!"